not in a paticularly good mood today. i hope yiyuan stops reading my blog. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop.

i thot there was still at least 1% of hope. but its all gone now... all gone... no more.

and for a moment i was jumping with joy... tears nearly flowing out bcuz i was too happy. but covered by my insane laughter. nv felt any better. but. just after one lesson. one D&T lesson. all gone.... all gone....i didnt know y too. y did i feel so sad. i didnt even understand what was going on. tears flowed down... they just did. n i allowed them to. one drop by one drop, the crystals flowed to my maths textbook. there was no reason for me to cry. bcuz i din even know anything. maybe its just another of my cunning ways to attract other's attention. i didnt need attention. but i wanted it. for once. for someone to really care. like in other cliques. where everyone is bonded. like some shitty sticky glue. where everyone knows ach other well. n no one has to bottle up their feelings in fear of being ignored. [to a paticular person] i'm sure u have felt tt way too. n i know how it feels now.... i'm sorry. i'm really sorry. i swear i will never be that bitch again... ok. getting out of point. n thx sherilyn n jan. i dun noe wad u did. but u cheered me up. thanx. really.

sigh. bad things just keep happening today. zhiying came. we went out. to tbp. wanted to take picture. n i pressed the wrong button. n there goes $6. nvm. sigh. n wad happened in school. i dun wanna talk abt it. i cant. bcuz i'm so confused now. if i say another word. things will get worse... worse... i should have just shut my mouth n not shared anything with grace... n bring back all the memories.....

not exactly in the mood to blog today. yep. end of story. =P

she's not angry with me